


Just one Hug

by MiriamMT



Series: Gallavich & Yevgeny [20]
Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Baby Yevgeny Milkovich, Bipolar Ian Gallagher, Domestic Ian Gallagher/Mickey Milkovich, Hurt Mickey Milkovich, Kid Yevgeny Milkovich, M/M, Mickey Milkovich Takes Care of Ian Gallagher, POV Yevgeny Milkovich, Parent Ian Gallagher, Parents Ian Gallagher/Mickey Milkovich, Sad Yevgeny Milkovich, Svetlana Milkovich Being an Asshole
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-07
Updated: 2020-05-11
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:00:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 12,471
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24063241
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MiriamMT/pseuds/MiriamMT
Summary: Yevgeny spends every other weekend at his dad's house with his dad and Ian. Ian takes great care of him but Mickey has his issues... as if he was scared of him. He refuses to hug him or touch him until he fully turns away and lets Ian raise Yevgeny when he comes over. Yevgeny doesn't understand why his dad is like this towards him and he just wishes it would change... in the mean time Svetlana plots against Mickey and IanThe first half will be out of Yev's POV
Relationships: Ian Gallagher & Mickey Milkovich & Yevgeny Milkovich, Ian Gallagher/Mickey Milkovich
Series: Gallavich & Yevgeny [20]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1735285
Comments: 25
Kudos: 166





	1. 2 Years old

2 years old

My mommy rings the bell to my dad’s house. I always spend three days at his place, that is going to bed two times. I like spending time here. Dad’s house is bigger and less crowded than mom’s place, and both my dad and Ian are there in the evening, unlike mommy who must work late. So, I almost look forward to going to bed here, because I always get a good night story from Ian.

The door opens and I see my dad, he is smaller than my mommy, he always looks at her like he doesn’t like her. She gives him a bag with my things, and he says: “He’s got stuff here, Svetlana.”  
“Who knows what crazy carrot boy does between visiting days”, mommy says. That is there whole conversation. With “Crazy carrot boy” my mommy means Ian. I don’t know why she calls him that, but he does look a bit like a carrot.

Mommy hugs me tightly and says “Goodbye, love”, in Russian. I understand both her language and English, what everybody else speaks. This is the point where visiting time officially begins. I say goodbye to mommy and go inside of dad’s house. I quickly run towards dad to hug him too, I hug his leg, because I’m very small in contrast to him. He just looks down at me and nods as greeting – I don’t get a hug.

But then I see Ian coming from the living room and I run to him and Ian takes me into his arms, picks me up and hugs me.

“Hey, Yevy”, he says and grins at me. He is always very happy to see me, unlike dad.  
“Did you have a good week?”, Ian asks and sits down on the couch with me.

I get better at the talking, so I start telling him about my mom and her friends and the new toy she gave me. I don’t think Ian understands everything I say, but he smiles and nods a lot and says “That’s great Yevy”

Dad is in the kitchen and puts my snacks away my mommy packed into the bag she gave him.  
I take my own backpack that Ian put on the sofa next to us. I’m very proud that I have my own backpack, I open it clumsily, Ian tries to help but I push his hand away – “Big Boy”, I say to him and point at me, he laughs and nods, “Yeah, you’re a big boy already, you can do that on you own, right?” 

I nod and get the backpack open, I pull my new toy out, it is a small Russian doll my mommy gave me.  
“Russian”, I say and show it to Ian, “Matryoshka doll”, I pull the two halves of the first doll open and proudly present the other doll inside – the first time mommy showed me I was excited and so was Ian.

“Wow, there’s another doll in it, Yevy are you a magician?”  
“No”, I laugh, “It’s a Russian doll, they do that always”, I nod, and I take the second doll and opened it to show him there was another doll in it.  
Ian smiles at me and ruffles my hair, “You are the cutest little boy on the planet.”

Ian says that often, there is another child in his family, her name is “Franny” I sometimes get to play with her, Ian calls her “cutest little girl on the planet” – I wonder how it comes that both the cutest children live in the same place.

I look back to the kitchen were dad is on his phone. I wonder if he thinks I’m cute too, if not I have to show him how cute I am. I get down from the sofa and take the Russian doll. I quickly run to him.

“Daddy, look!”, I say and hold the doll up to him, “My new toy.”  
Dad looks down at me shortly, “Cool.”, he just says.  
“You did not look!”  
“I did.”  
“No”, I say, and I stand on his foot to hold the doll further up.  
“Yevgeny get down from my foot”, Dad only says.  
“But look!”, I say, and he looks down again and I smile at him the cutest way I could.  
“It’s a Russian doll”, he just says, “Aren’t you too young for that? Ian, isn’t he too young for that? What is he supposed to do with a damn Russian doll?”

Dad often does this, he doesn’t talk to me directly, but he talks to Ian about me. I get down from dad and look at my doll. I like it, it’s colourful and pretty and it has secrets – it’s almost magical.

I feel sad now and I don’t know if it is because dad doesn’t like my toy or because he doesn’t think I’m cute. Sometimes I think dad doesn’t like me. 

Ian comes to us, he picks me up.  
“Don’t listen to him Yevy, I think it’s a great toy. Let’s go to your room and then we can open all the figures until we get to the smallest one, okay?”  
I nod, that sounds like fun, Ian smiles at me, I look at dad, but he turned away from us.

Ian sighs and takes dad hand, he puts a kiss on the letters on dad’s knuckles and the brings me to my room.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It was many weeks later, I know when one week is over, because I go back from my dad’s place to my mom’s place.

Now she brought me to my dad’s place again. He opens the door like usual.

“You’re early”, he says to my mom.  
“I’m not, I bring him same time as always.”  
“Okay, then Ian is late. Bring him over when Ian’s back.”  
“Don’t bullshit me, you wanted visiting days, you get visiting days, now, like always.”  
“But Ian isn’t home yet”  
“What do I care?”  
“Svetlana-“  
“Or I can just take custody from you and carrot boy” 

Dad looks at her, then closes his eyes and sighs, “Okay, whatever, come in Yevgeny.”  
My mommy hugs me goodbye and I go to hug dad’s leg – but like every week I don’t get a hug from him.

“Ian?”, I call through the house.  
“Ian’s at work, Yevgeny.”  
“When comes home?”  
“I don’t know. Soon. Go to your room and play something, okay?”  
“Come with, daddy”  
“No… I’m busy. Go play in your room with your toys until Ian comes home, okay?”

“Please?”, I ask and hug his leg again, I look up at him as cutely as I could, “Play choo-choo”  
“You can play with the train on your own or when Ian comes.”, he only says and wiggles his leg so I let go of him.

Dad never plays anything with me, reads books to me or even picks me up. I don’t know why… but it makes me very sad.

I slowly go to my room.  
“Dark”, I call to my dad, he comes after a while and switches on the lights, I can’t reach the switch yet. I sit down in the middle of my room where Ian and I always build on our choo-choo train.

Playing alone isn’t a lot of fun, so I want to wait for Ian with some juice. I go to the living room, dad sits on the couch, he doesn’t look very busy.  
“Daddy, I want juice.”

He looks down at me, “Juice?”  
I nod.  
“Okay”, he gets up, “I can do that. I can give you juice.”, he says and goes to the kitchen, I go after him.

“What juice do you usually get from Ian?”, he asks me.  
“There”, I say and point at the fridge, Ian always gets my juice from the fridge.  
“Yeah, I know that you get juice from the fridge but which one? Apple or orange?”  
My juice isn’t orange, it’s yellow, “Yellow”, I say to him and he nods, he grabs a juice carton and fills a bit into a Sippy cup he gives me.

He looks down at me and he smiles a bit.  
I grin at him and keep drinking. He puts the juice away again and leans against the fridge.

He never smiled at me like this before and he looks at me for longer than usual. Maybe I made it that he finally thinks I’m cute. I take the cup out of my mouth and go to him to hug his leg again, I don’t get a reaction. I look at him and raise my arms towards him, “Up”, I say, usually Ian always picks me up when I say this, and he always smiles, because he likes it when I talk and use my words inside of just showing what I want.

“No, Yevgeny” Dad says and shakes his head.  
“Up!”  
“No”, he says again.

Why wouldn’t he pick me up? Why doesn’t he like me?  
“U-up!”  
“No, Yevgeny, there is no need to pick you up, you’re fine down there!”, he says and wants to leave the kitchen.

I sob, I can feel tears coming to my eyes and I start crying, dad stops and turns around to me, I start crying louder and let the juice fall to the ground.  
“Yevgeny stop crying, there is no reason to cry”  
This only makes me scream and cry louder. I needed to be comforted – why wouldn’t he comfort me?

“Up!”, I beg him, but he doesn’t. I let myself fall to the ground and keep crying.  
“Yevgeny stop crying”, his tone changes, “Please stop crying”, now he begs me, but he doesn’t comfort me, doesn’t hug me.

“Stop crying, stop crying, stop crying”, I hear him pleading, I can see him slowly sitting down on the ground too, leaning against a counter with his back, he holds his hands to his ears.

I crawl towards him – he was sad too! Maybe if I comforted him, he would see how to do it. I crawl to him and put my hand on his leg to stand up, but he only scoots away like I hurt him. I sit back down and scream louder.

Finally, Ian appears in the kitchen. He looks shocked from me to dad and back, as if he doesn’t know who to comfort first. I crawl to him and raise my hands up to him and he finally picks me up.

Ian rocks me in his arms. “Shh”, he mumbles, “it’s okay Yevy, I’m here, Ian’s here”, he whispers and kisses my forehead.

Ian slowly sits down next to dad, who leans against him and hides his face in Ian’s shirt. Ian kisses the top of his head and comforts him too.

But dad doesn’t deserve Ian’s comfort! Dad was mean and wouldn’t comfort me either! I push against dad’s head to push him away from my Ian, “No!”, I say to him.

“Hey, Yevy, be nice”, Ian says, he reaches for a towel that lies on the counter above us and dries my tears, I cuddle against him.

Ian puts one arm around dad and pulls him back in. “Mick, what happened?”  
“You weren’t here”, Dad whispers, “Why weren’t you here when she brought him?”  
“I’m sorry, I got hold up at work, Mickey. Why was Yevy crying?”  
“I don’t know”, dad’s breathing went faster, “I don’t know. He wanted juice, I gave him juice, he wanted to be picked up, I said no, and he started crying.”

Ian sighs and kisses dad’s forehead.  
“He just wanted to be picked up by his dad, Mick.”  
Dad shakes his head, “I can’t… I can’t touch him. I can barely even look at him, every time I do… I just see my dad and Svetlana and everything’s coming back… I can’t do this Ian.”

“Yevgeny is innocent, he has nothing to do with this.”, Ian says and makes my dad look him in the eyes, “You know that.”  
Dad nods, “I know that, theoretically. But I can’t help thinking about it… living it every time I look at him. Maybe I’m not even his dad, maybe it’s my dad, maybe Yevgeny is my brother, or he is the son of some dude with 50 bugs in his pocket. But if there is the possibility that he comes from… that. From that day… It’s all I’ll ever be able to see. I’m afraid.”

Ian shakes his head, “Mickey”, he says softly, “I know this isn’t easy for you… shit I should have just helped you more when it happened. But… you have to try. He’s an innocent baby, he just needs some food, some juice and a hug now and then. You never even held him. Do you really want to go through life without holding your baby at least once?”

“Can’t you fucking listen to me?”, Dad says, and his voice gets louder, and he sounds more desperate, “I can’t touch him.”  
“You didn’t even try.”  
“I’m afraid to hurt him”, he whispers, “Ian, I don’t want to hurt him.”  
“You won’t hurt him by holding him. And you know, I’m always here, I’m always right by your side and I will help you to finally get over the thing with Svetlana. But I need you to try.”

Dad looks at me and then at Ian, who slowly hands me over to him.  
“Just once, just a few seconds, I’m right here with you”, Ian says calmly and hands me over to dad.  
Dad holds me in his hands and looks down at me, Ian kisses his cheek. Dad looks at me like he is scared of me, like I am mean and am hurting him.

After a few seconds he quickly pushes me back to Ian roughly, who quickly takes me back. I don’t know what I did wrong, I don’t know why dad pushed me away again, I start crying again.

Ian comforts me, rubs his hand over my back. Dad looks at the ground.  
“You didn’t hurt him”, Ian says to dad, “You’re both still okay.”  
Dad shakes his head, “I’m not”, he says and gets up. Ian stands up as well.

“Fucking look at me, Ian! I can’t even hold a child for more than ten seconds because he might come from what my dad and Svetlana did three years ago! I’m a fucking mess, still! It’s fucking pathetic!”  
Ian shakes his head, “You’re not pathetic, Mickey.”  
“I am. And I don’t know why you’re even still here.”  
“Because I love you”, Ian says sincerely, “Because I will always love you, and I didn’t help you when this happened, and I will help you now. And I’m a mess too and you stay with me, because you love me, too. Right?”

Dad looks at Ian, I am silent again and just lean against him, Dad nods, “I love you, too, Ian. But I… I can’t love him.”  
“What are you saying?”, Ian asks and holds on to me tighter.  
“I know that you love him. But you made me ask Svetlana for custody. You wanted custody, you wanted him, I didn’t. And you are great with him, you could be such an amazing dad to him. So… please just, take care of him and let me out of it.”

“Mickey… I want both of you, I want us to be a family.”  
“I can be your family, and he can be your family, but I can’t be his. I can’t give you a family and a white picket fence, Ian. I wish I could, because I want to give you everything you want… but I can’t… Hey I’m not making you choose between him and me, Ian. I just can’t take care of him with you together.”

Ian nodded eventually, he slowly went to my dad and kissed his forehead again, “Maybe one day you can. I’m not gonna give up hope. But I won’t force you.”  
“Thank you.”  
Ian nodded, “Okay, I go play with him. You should… lie down or something, okay?”  
Dad nodded.


	2. 6 Years old

6 years old

Mommy brings me over to Ian. It’s dad’s house, and dad is there, but I don’t really go “to dad” when I come here, I go to Ian. It’s always Ian who opens the door, hugs me, plays with me, talks to me and everything. I barely ever see dad, except when we’re eating together or when I crawl into Ian and dad’s bed at night after I had a nightmare.

But today dad opens the door again.

He sighs when he sees me and mom, “Svetlana, please, this isn’t possible this weekend.”, he says.  
“Why not?”  
“I told you it’s not possible, and that you shouldn’t bring him over.”  
“I know, I read text. But that is not how shared custody works. You can let carrot boy do all the work, but you can’t cancel visiting time.”

Dad looks at me and then back to mommy, “Ian is sick”, he says.  
“Sick like cold or sick like crazy?”  
“Don’t say that, he is not crazy.”  
Mommy crosses her arms in front of her chest.  
“It’s a depressed episode, he can’t get out of bed, he can’t take care of Yevgeny.”  
“Then you take care of him. You have custody.”  
“He shouldn’t see Ian like this though”  
“Then don’t let him see.”, mommy just says and then says goodbye to me, ignoring dad’s protests.

Dad sighs defeatedly, “Come in”, he says to me and I enter the house.

“Ian is sick?”, I ask dad.  
“Yeah.”  
“Can I say hello to him?”  
“I don’t know…”, he says, he is different than usual, he isn’t as cold towards me.  
“Please”, I say.

Dad sighs, “I see if it’s okay”, he says and goes to the bedroom, I follow him, “Stay out here”, he says to me.

I stay in front of the door while dad goes into the dark bedroom.  
“Hey, freckles”, I hear dad’s soft voice, “Yevgeny is here. He wants to say hello…”  
There is a long pause, I can’t hear anything.  
“No? I’m sure he would be happy to see you… No? Okay… it’s okay, I got this. I’m just gonna tuck you in, okay? You don’t need to worry about a thing, just sleep. I come back in an hour and bring you some food, you’re up for that?”

Dad comes back out, “Sorry, Yevgeny, he doesn’t feel so good, he doesn’t want you to see him like this.”  
“Will he be okay again?”  
“Yeah, sure, he’s always gonna be okay again. By the time you come back here, he’ll be back to his old self. Go to your room and play something, okay? I call you when dinner’s ready.”

I nod and go to my room. I don’t like spending the whole weekend just with dad and without Ian, it never happened before, but I can only imagine that I will have to play alone for the whole weekend. Maybe I could call my mommy and cry until she picks me up again.

After an hour Dad calls me to dinner. He made pasta. We eat very quietly.  
“How was your week?”, he asks me, how Ian usually does.  
I shrug, “One mean kid at kindergarten broke my T-Rex.”, I say, “I wanted to ask Ian if he can repair it.”  
Dad nods, “I’m sure you can do that together next week.”  
I shrug.

After dinner, he says I can watch TV because he has to take care of Ian now. From the couch I watch him heating up a bowel with pasta and taking a spoon and some pills out of orange pill bottles.

I can’t help my curiosity, so I follow dad to the bedroom a few minutes later, he let the door open a few inches, it was enough to see them.

Dad sits on the bed, leaning against the headboard, he balances the bowel with pasta on one leg, on the other he had put a kitchen towel and Ian rests his head on it. Dad puts some of the pasta on the spoon and slowly feeds Ian with it, while running a hand through his red hair. Ian looks like he doesn’t want to eat it, but Mickey makes him eat at least five spoons full of pasta.

I have never seen dad being so caring and gentle with another person. I quickly go back to the living room and the TV before they can see me.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ian still doesn’t feel better, dad and I had breakfast alone, I sit in my room and look for something I could play. But most of my games need at least 2 players. I take my UNO game and go to dad, who is cleaning the kitchen.

“Dad? Can we go visit Aunt Debbie and Franny?”  
“No, sorry, I already asked if they want to come over, but Franny already has a play date with a friend today.”  
“Oh… maybe just Aunt Debbie? Or Sandy, Sandy wasn’t around in a while anymore, maybe I can play with her.”

Dad looks at me, I hold the UNO game to my chest. He sighs, “I ask her, okay?”  
I smile and nod, he knows I stare at him until he asks her, so he takes his phone immediately and types on the screen.  
“I’ll tell you when she answers”, he says. I nod and sit down at the kitchen table.  
“I wait here.”

He looks at me for a longer moment, he closes his eyes and exhales deeply.  
“I play with you”, he says eventually.  
I look at him surprised – dad never wanted to play with me!

“If you want to”, he adds, I nod quickly, and he sits down at the table.  
“You know the rules?”  
“I guess, but why don’t you explain them again for me?”

I explain the rules to him while giving him is number of cards, “We start with five cards because I can’t hold seven”, I say excitedly.  
“Okay, who starts?”  
“Me!”, I grin and put a card down.

We play two rounds until Sandy comes. I like Sandy, she is dad’s cousin and sometimes comes around to the house, sleeps here and always plays with me and shows me cool handshakes and how to pickpocket – Ian doesn’t like when she’s doing that.

As soon as Sandy was there, dad left us pretty much alone to play.

Sandy leaves the next day around noon, hugging me goodbye tightly.  
I have a few more hours until my mommy comes.

I sit in my room and play with my dinosaurs. After a while dad comes into my room.  
“You alright, kid?”, he asks.  
I nod, but I’m sad because my T-Rex is still broken, and he just looks less intimidating with only one arm.

“Is that your broken T-Rex?”, dad asks.  
I nod, “Jeffrey broke his arm off”  
Dad sits down across from me and takes the dinosaur, he belongs to the Playmobil dinosaurs Ian gave me for my birthday after I had begged him and mom for them for weeks.

“Well, that’s easy to repair, he only pulled it out, I can just click it back in”, dad says.  
“Really?”  
“Yeah, do you have the arm?”  
I quickly got the arm out of my backpack and handed it to dad, he repaired the toy in no time.

“Woah, cool, thanks dad”, I grin and take the dino back, “Now he looks scary again! Do you want to see how my volcano works, too?”  
“Uhm, sure, why not”

I showed him the volcano, put some stones on the top and then pushed a button so the red lava on top shot up and the stones flew off the volcano top through the room. “Boom”, I exclaim, “And then all the dinos were dead!”

Dad smiles, “That’s pretty cool.”  
An alarm goes off on his phone suddenly, “Sorry, I have to give Ian his medicine now. Your mom should be here soon to get you, okay?”  
I nod and look after him.

This weekend he had been nicer to me than ever before, as long as I could remember.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next weekend, Ian is fine again. He opens the door like usual and hugs me.  
“Yevgeny, I need to talk to dad and carrot boy, you go to your room, play”, mom says. I nod and got to my room, but I’m too curious about what they have to talk about – my mom doesn’t like Ian and she likes talking to dad even less.

“Why are you still here?”, is the first thing dad asks, “Ian, why is she still here?”  
“Mick, calm down, sit down. What is it, Svetlana?”

“As you know, Yevy will have his first day at school soon.”  
“Yes, we know, he’s really excited.”, Ian says, he is right, I am extremely excited to go to school in summer.  
“He wants you to be there, at first day in school.”  
“Ian was going to be there anyways. You can’t stop him from that”, Dad says.  
“Both of you”, mom clarifies.

I bite my bottom lip, I hope dad wants to come to my first day at school too.  
“Why me?”, dad asks.  
“Fuck if I know”, mom shrugs, “But Yevgeny wants it, so you will be there, and you will smile and not be grumpy little toddler.”

“You don’t have to if you don’t want to”, I hear Ian say.  
“Yes, he has to.”, mom insists.  
“You don’t get to decide shit, Svetlana. Thanks for delivering the news, now leave my fucking house!”, Ian says – I have never heard him this angry before. Is this how they always talk with each other when I’m not in the room?

“That wasn’t all, carrot boy. About the custody, now that Yevgeny will go to school during the week, I want weekends too.”  
“Forget it, the weekends belong to us!”, Ian says, dad was noticeably quiet.  
“Other people do it like that – visiting hours every second weekend!”  
“I don’t give a fuck about what other people do. I’m not only gonna see Yevy four days a month!”  
“You get Friday evening until Sunday evening, it’s almost six days.”  
“It’s five days at best, Svetlana. You can’t do this! We deserve to get him for more than just five days per month. We only live two streets down from each other!”  
“You can take every second weekend or no custody at all, how about that?”, mom says.

Why does no one ask me what I want? I don’t want to only have every second weekend with Ian! I want more than four days every month!

“You are such a fucking bitch”, dad finally speaks again.  
“Why do you even care? You don’t even want Yevgeny around”, mom says to him, “You let Ian do all the work and just hide until Yevy is gone again!”  
“Yeah, Ian does everything for Yevgeny, he bought him fucking expensive toys, buys clothes with him, all that shit that you didn’t do with the kid for years, and now you want to cut the visiting days out of the blue?”  
“He is my son, I get to have weekends with him too, not just school days. Better be thankful I leave you four days, I can take custody away from you completely!”  
“You’re just a fucking selfish whore. Fuck you!”, dad says to her and raises his voice, “Leave our house before I break every bone in your body and fucking roll you outside!”


	3. 7 years old

7 years old

I am in second grade now. I only spend every second weekend with my dad and Ian, but by now all of us got used to it. I wish we would have more time together though. Ian always helps me with my homework and reads with me so I would get better.

Dad is in the kitchen looking for something to make for dinner.  
I finish reading the little story Ian gave me to practice, he grins and gets up to get me the cookie he promised me for making less mistakes than the last time.

“Did you find something for dinner?”, I hear him asking dad.  
“Yeah, we have to go grocery shopping tomorrow, but today we’re having pancakes, I just gotta look up a recipe.”  
“A recipe? Do you think Yevy could help you with that? Reading recipes is a good practise.”  
“Didn’t he already read for today? You’re practising as if he tries to win a prize.”  
“They get good grades for reading well.”, Ian says, “Don’t you want him to have good grades? Imagine - The first Milkovich to actually graduate high school!”

Ian laughs, I turn around on the couch and see Ian putting his arms around dad from behind, he kisses his cheek and whispers something into his ear. Dad turns around to him and kisses him on the mouth, they usually don’t do this in front of me, well, usually dad isn’t around when I’m with Ian.

Ian says something to him I can’t understand and dad sighs and nods.  
“Yevy, do you want to help your dad cooking and read a recipe to him?”  
I’m not sure if I want that… I was never allowed to cook with dad before…

I slowly get up and go to the kitchen to him.  
Ian ruffles my hair, “Okay, I have to do something for work, be nice to each other”, Ian says and kisses dad’s cheek. Dad just shakes his head and looks down at me, I smile at him.

“Okay, you gonna help me and read the recipe out loud?”  
I nod.  
“Okay, come here.”, dad picks me up and sits me down on the countertop. I blink a few times, I’m not sure if he ever picked me up before, he hands me his phone and shows me what I have to read out.

I watch him measure the ingredients I read out, I concentrate really hard to not make a mistake so the pancakes wouldn’t get messed up.  
“And now we put them together?”, I ask when the flour, sugar, eggs and everything stood around in small bowls.  
“Yeah, you want to know the secret for great pancakes? Not even Ian knows.”  
I nod excitedly.

“Okay, so every recipe says that you just need to crack the eggs and put them into the mixing bowl with everything else, but that’s nonsense. You need to crack the eggs and separate the egg whites from the yolks, than you need to beat the egg whites until they are all a fluffy and then you mix the rest of the stuff under it.”  
“And then the pancakes are fluffy?”, I ask.  
“Well, whose pancakes taste better? Mine or Ian’s?”  
That was an easy question, the rare times I had dad’s pancakes for breakfast they were always the best thing ever!  
“Yours”  
“See, that’s all the proof you need.”

Dad takes one of the eggs and cracks it, he separates the white and the yolk and fills the white into the mixing bowl.  
“Can I try too?”  
“You want to try it too? But it’s pretty advanced cooking already, even Ian struggles with this.”  
I shrug, “Can I please try?”, I ask, how I know dad, he would stay with his ‘no’, but it looked fun when he did it and I wanted to try too

Dad sighs, “Okay, wait a second.”, he wipes his hands on a towel and pulls a chair from the kitchen table in front of the counter and tells me to stand on it. Dad stands behind me.

“Okay, take the egg.”, I follow his instructions, he puts his hand over mine and helps me to crack the egg at the side of the bowl, I smile when it cracks open, this is fun, “Now you take one half of the shell into the one hand, the other one into the other hand. Okay, now pour the yolk from one half into the other one”

Dad helps me with the process, and I get all of the egg white into the bowl and pour the yolk to the other one in a separate bowl. I want to cheer about my success, but I notice that some pieces of eggshell fell into the yolks.  
“Oh-oh”  
I look up at dad and I expect him to send me out of the kitchen now, but he doesn’t.

“That’s no problem”, he just says, takes a spoon and fishes the pieces of shell out of the eggs, “There, all good again.” 

“Now how do the eggs get fluffy?”, I ask him.  
He smiles and takes out his hand mixer, “You can just whisk them by hand too, I guess that’s what Ian does for those biceps, but we wouldn’t be eating by tomorrow morning.”  
I laugh while he sets up the mixer, I am surprised that he lets me stay in the kitchen, I’m even more surprised when he says, “You want to try this?”  
I nod eagerly.

Dad is in such a better mood when he is cooking, maybe he should always be cooking… maybe I can help him in the future too. He helps me whisking the eggs until they look like a fluffy cloud. We put the rest of the ingredients together until the batter is finished.  
“Can we put them into the pan now?”  
“Not yet now come the two most important steps. What kind of pancakes are we making? We can add chocolate chips or cinnamon.”  
“Cinnamon pancakes?”, I ask.  
Dad nods, “They’re Ian’s favourite. Usually, they are a special Christmas treat, but they’re fine for October too.”  
“I want to do cinnamon pancakes then.”  
“Okay”, he smiles and gets the cinnamon from a shelf, he put a few teaspoons into the batter, mixed it together and said, “And now the most important step.”  
“What is that?”

Dad grins and gets two spoons out, “Tasting.”  
I grin brightly, “Mommy never allows me to taste from the bowl!”  
Dad nods, “Also don’t tell Ian, it’s supposed to be unhealthy but it’s delicious”, he smiles and hands me a spoon.

We dip the spoons into the batter, and it tastes better than I even imagined! No wonder mommy and Ian don’t want us to eat it, I could eat the whole bowl clean.

“Hey”, Ian said from behind us suddenly, “You’re not eating the raw batter, are you?”  
I gasp and quickly hide the spoon, Dad turns around to him, some batter still on his lips, and the spoon obviously in his hand – stupid! Ian will see this way!  
“No, we’d never”, Dad says.

Ian just smiles and comes over he kisses dad’s lips and smiles, “Cinnamon?”  
Dad nods and Ian takes the spoon from dad and tastes the batter as well, “What did I do to get cinnamon pancakes?”, he asks grinning widely.  
“Nothing, Yevgeny chose it.”  
“Great choice, Yevy”, Ian says smiling, “I usually only get those for Christmas or my birthday”  
He takes my spoon and his spoon away and brings them to the sink.

“Do we fry them now?”, I ask dad.  
“Yeah, but I’m gonna do that alone, okay? You’re just gonna burn yourself and then your mom’s gonna be mad at us.”  
“Okay.”, I say, “But I did a good job at helping, right?”  
“Yeah, a fantastic job, Yevy”, Dad smiles, and I think it’s the first time he calls me Yevy, “I’m proud of you”, he says next and looks at me like he was super serious, “For a lot of things.”

I look at him… it is crazy how happy it makes me to hear dad saying this. I don’t even know why but I feel like I always wanted to hear him say that – and now I want to hug him.

I’m not sure if I should, but I just have to try – I hug him.

And I feel dad hugging me back. His hug feels warmer than I ever expected. I feel protected in a new way like this and I don’t want to let go, but I eventually have to.

When we stop hugging, I smile and climb down from the chair.  
“Yevy, go wash your hands and play something in your room, alright?”, Ian says, “We call you when dinner’s ready.”  
I nod and leave the kitchen. But before I go to the bathroom, I hear them talking.

“I’m proud of you”, Ian says.  
“Because I got my shit together for twenty minutes?”  
“I’d call this a breakthrough. You made him happy just by spending a little time with him.”  
“It was fun”, Dad says, “I guess I’m just more relaxed while cooking.”

“He seemed pretty desperate for that hug, maybe you don’t hug him often enough”, Dad mumbles.  
“I hug him all the time, Mick. He was desperate for a hug from you, spending time with you, getting a little love. That’s all a child needs sometimes. If you can cook with him more often that would already be a great start, you could really start building a relationship with him.”

“It’s a bit late for that, isn’t it?”  
“It never is too late to be a good dad.”, Ian says, “I love you, Mickey.”  
“I love you too”  
Then I hear kissing noises and quickly go to the bathroom to wash my hands.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It’s been several months since Dad started behaving more like a dad. It started with us cooking together every weekend I was at his place and he did more and more stuff with me and Ian. I love this new kind of attention and bond with him.

It is late, I’m actually in bed already, but I can’t sleep. I hear dad and Ian in the living room, they talk but I can’t really understand what they are saying. I wonder if I can stay with them until I could fall asleep.

I slowly get out of bed and go to my door, it wasn’t fully closed.

“I’m proud of you, Mick”, Ian says, I stop at the door and listen, “You grew so much over the last months, I can’t believe it. Did you secretly start therapy?”  
“No. I just… I did a lot of thinking about us and Yevgeny. There were feelings I had to deal with, that I could never really place.”  
“Like?”

There is a short pause, “When Svetlana used to say she wants to take custody away, I used to not care. But when she does it now… well, the last years, since she cut visiting days for us… I had weird feelings about it. I was angry at her, not only for taking the visiting days away from you… I think I wanted him around… at the same time I wasn’t ready to be his dad yet… I think I’m ready now… if it’s not too late.”  
“He’s still a child, you still got time.”, Ian reassures him.

“But really, my main reason to finally work on myself and get this right… was that I love you.”  
I frown, what has this to do with me? Ian doesn’t seem to understand it either, because dad keeps explaining:  
“Once, you said you want us to be a family and I said, I could never give that to you… us three being a family. But now… I want to give it to you, I want you to have it because I want to have it with you, too. I knew I had to clean up my act for that, get my shit together… so I worked really fucking hard on myself – for the first time ever.”

“You’re fucking perfect, Mick”, I hear Ian say quietly, almost whispering, as if he couldn’t believe what he just heard, “I love you so much.”  
“I love you too”, dad says, “And I want to spend the rest of my life with you, I want to have a family with you and Yevy. I’m ready now.”

There is silence again, I open the door a bit wider and see them kissing each other.  
“You really would spend the rest of your life with me?”, Ian asks when they separate again.  
Dad nods, “Do you want that too?”  
“Of course, I want that, Mickey, more than anything else in the fucking world.”  
“Good”, dad says, and I can see him sliding from the couch to the ground.

“Mick, are you-“  
“Shut up and give me your hand... I actually wanted to do this in a few days when I have a damn ring for you”, dad says, “But it feels right, now.”  
“Just fucking ask me!”, Ian laughs.  
“You don’t want to hear my speech?”  
“You got a speech?”  
“No, but I planned on writing one, I could just improvise.”  
“Fucking ask me finally!”

“Okay. Ian Clayton Gallagher will you marry me?”  
“Yes!”, Ian exclaims, “Fucking of course yes!”, he laughs and leans down to kiss dad.

I smile secretly.  
“Just one thing, I had to ask your brother for your middle name, in exchange I had to promise he’d be your best man if you say yes.”  
Ian laughs brightly, Dad appears back on the couch, smiling from ear to ear.  
“So, I’m even getting a ring?”  
“Yeah, I’m gonna meet my ring-guy on Monday, you can come with me and pick one out.”  
“I guess that’s not entirely legal?”  
“Do you think I have the money to buy you a ring from before they were stolen?”, Dad chuckles and they kiss again.

I yawn. I am more tired than I was before, but I want to sleep with dad and Ian tonight. I slowly open the door further and quietly walk to the couch to them. They stop kissing when they notice me.  
“Hey Yevy”, Ian says, he looks like he had cried, “What’s up, can’t you sleep?”  
I shake my head and climb on the couch to them, I lie my head down in Ian’s lap and put my legs over dad’s legs. One of them is putting a blanket over me.

“I guess we have to wait with celebrating this until he is with his mom again.”, Ian whispers.


	4. She won't win

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> POV change  
> I hate POV changes in the middle of a story, but I needed to tell the beginning out of Yev's POV and now it's just not practical anymore

Ian and Mickey are engaged for a while now. The planning of their wedding goes slow, Mickey does the most of it – Ian didn’t think Mickey would want a big wedding, but his mottos for the whole wedding are “Bigger than the wedding with Svetlana” and “Gayest wedding the southside has ever seen”

Ian walks through the Milkovich house in the morning, Mickey is still in bed. Ian makes a fresh coffee and gets the mail. He goes through the different letters, a new letter from Mickey’s brother from prison, bills and a letter addressed to Mickey from… family court?

Ian frowns at the letter, he takes a cup of coffee and goes to the bedroom.  
He sits down on the bed next to Mickey, “Babe”, he mumbles and leans down to kiss his cheek, trying to not spill the coffee, “I know you’re awake.”  
“But I don’t have to be, so let me sleep.”  
“I made you coffee”, Ian says sweetly, “You have to get up anyways, we want to look at your flowers later. Mhm, the star lilies.”  
“Stargazer lilies”, Mickey corrects and sits up, immediately reaching for the coffee, “You gotta remember that.”

Ian smiles at him and looks at the letter in his hand.  
“What’s that? Did Iggy write from prison?”  
“Yeah, but this is… from family court.”  
“Family Court? Why would they send a letter? Open it.”   
Ian opens the letter and cross-reads it, while Mickey watches him tiredly, “And?”

Ian’s jaw drops to the ground and he lets the letter fall.  
“Ian?”, Mickey asks worried, “What is it?”  
Tears brim Ian’s eyes and roll down his face, Mickey puts the coffee down and cups his cheeks with his hands, “Hey, don’t cry”, he whispered and wipes a tear away with his thumb, he reaches for the letter but Ian pushes the paper away and finds his words again.

“She’s taking him away”, he whispers.  
“Who is taking who away?”  
“Svetlana”, Ian sobs, “She wants to have sole custody for Yevgeny. She wants to take him away from us.”

Mickey stares at him speechless and just pulls him into his arms.  
“She can’t do that”, Mickey whispers, “She won’t be able to take him away from us, we take good care of him, he wants to see us, she can’t get sole custody.”  
“What if she can? She always threatened to take your custody rights away, it would be easy, I’m crazy and you’re a criminal.”  
“And she’s a whore”, Mickey says, “We can give Yevgeny better living conditions than she can, the court won’t give her sole custody, they can’t!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Ian is a mess. Mickey worries, he might fall into a depression, which won’t help their case in front of the family court at all.

Svetlana blocks all of his and Ian’s attempts to contact her or Yevgeny and also didn’t bring Yevgeny over for the weekend.

Mickey can’t explain this situation, the last months he and Yevgeny started forming a bond, Mickey finally behaves like a real father towards him and gives his best to be a good dad. There was no reason to take Yevgeny away from them… except Svetlana being a selfish bitch that wants Yevgeny all to herself.

It’s the day of the court appearance.  
Mickey didn’t sleep at all the night before, Ian still lies in bed, staring at the wall. Mickey sighs when he sees him, he crawls back into bed with him, he was already wearing his “court outfit”.

“Freckles, I need you to be strong now, okay? You can’t fall into a depression, you need to get up and fight for Yevgeny, together with me.”, he mumbles and wraps his arms around his fiancé from behind.

“It’s not an episode”, Ian mumbles.  
“Yet” Mickey whispers, “And I hope it won’t become one, but you need to get up now and come to court with me.”

“I don’t think I can”, Ian whispers and sobs, “What if she wins? I don’t want to live without seeing him anymore.”  
“She won’t win”  
“What if she does though? What if she takes him away?”  
“It won’t happen. I won’t let her…”, he kisses Ian’s shoulder, “But if… if she wins, we still have each other, freckles. Would you still marry me without him?”

“Of course, I would still marry you. Why would you even ask that?”  
Mickey shrugs, “Sometimes I’m afraid you’re only with me because of the child.”  
Ian shakes his head and turns around in Mickey’s arms, scooting closer.

“I love you. And I want to get married to you. And I want Yevgeny to be at our wedding.”  
Mickey kisses the top of Ian’s head, “He will be there, freckles. I promise you, Yevgeny will be at our wedding and he will be on the pictures. But that can only happen if you come with me today. Okay?”

Ian nods and slowly detaches himself from Mickey and crawls out of bed.


	5. Ian's my dad too

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another word  
> I DO NOT want to feed into the mindset of people that divorced women just want to take the kids away from the ex's for no reason. The majority by far of women who want sole custody do this bc they're genuily concerned about their child. The majority of divorced women by far are not money hungry whores who try to suck every coin out of their ex husband's, like the media and some people on the internet might suggest.  
> Of course there are always bad people and exceptions. But please don't disregard all people's needs and wants because of the mistakes of a few. Everybody who is part of a minority and discriminated group in any way knows what this feels like. That starts at "All black men are dangerous bc sure in history there once was this one black killer" and ends in "All trans women are evil bc there is this one trans women who is a rapist"  
> (Extreme examples but I'm trying to made a universal point)

Mickey and Ian walk down the hallways of the court building together with Sandy, who had suggested she could just kidnap Yevgeny and kill Svetlana if the judge grants her sole custody… or torture the judge. While Mickey still thinks this is the best solution, Ian insists, that the use of violence would not help their case.

When they round a corner to get to their court room, they finally see Yevgeny again.

The angle blond boy jumps up from his seat in the hallway and runs to them, “Dad! Ian!”, he shouts and hugs Mickey first, both man squat down in front of him to hug him properly.

Sandy stands next to them, “Domestic bitches”, she mumbles and shakes her head, “Don’t I get a hug, Yevy?”

“Take a number”, Ian says to her and hugs the boy tighter.  
“Ian, you’re squishing me”, Yevgeny laughs.  
Ian and Mickey let go of Yevgeny, who finally gets to hug Sandy too. They walk through the hallway together to Svetlana, who immediately pulls Yevgeny back to her and says something in Russian to him.

It doesn’t take long until they are allowed to enter the court room, Yevgeny has to stay outside for now with Sandy.

“You have a lawyer?”, Mickey asks Svetlana, “How the fuck can you afford that?”  
“Let that be my problem.”, she just says and walks past him to sit down at her spot.

Mickey and Ian sit down on the other side of the court room, they can’t afford a lawyer for this, but they figured, they don’t need one. They weren’t bad for Yevgeny and they could prove that without a lawyer.

The judge entered the room and after some formalities, Svetlana was allowed to explain why she wanted sole custody for her son.

“Mrs Milkovich”, her lawyer says, “has had an arrangement with Mr Milkovich about the custody of Yevgeny, before the child went to school, he spent every weekend at Mr Milkovich’s place. When he started going to school every second weekend, due to Mrs Milkovich wanting the chance to spend the weekends with her son too. Mrs Milkovich cares deeply about her son, like every good mother. She sacrificed a lot in her life to give him the best life she can afford and that with little child support from her ex-husbands side. For a longer time, she felt that Yevgeny is not in good care with his father and his boyfriend. Recently she came to the conclusion that Mr Milkovich is unable to care for Yevgeny appropriately and that she should have sole custody.”

Mickey looks from the lawyer to Ian, who looks at him confused as well, if anything the situation at home got better.

“Mr Milkovich comes from a family with a long criminal history and connection to the drug business. His cousin Sandra Milkovich is at the house quite frequently and most of her time she spends in prison, Mrs Milkovich was shocked when Yevgeny showed her pickpocketing skills and schemes he learned from Sandra. She is also certain that Mr Milkovich’s partner and his family have a bad influence on Yevgeny. Ian Gallagher has a mental illness which Yevgeny had to witness on multiple occasions and his sister was in prison for child endangerment. Thank you”, the lawyer ends his speech, Mickey and Ian are shocked about all the things Svetlana took completely out of context to make them look bad.

“We will get to Ian Gallagher later. Mr Milkovich, you don’t have a lawyer present. I want to hear what custody arrangement you think is the best for Yevgeny.”  
“Am I not allowed to say something about all that crap?”  
“All to its time, Mr Milkovich.”

Mickey sighs, he briefly looks to Ian and then at the judge, “We give Yevgeny a stable home. We live in our own house, unlike Svetlana, at least one of us is always there in the evening and not working, unlike Svetlana. He has his own room, his seat at the table and space on the couch, we take good care of him and I think we can provide a more stable home than Yevgeny’s mother could. But we are against taking one of his parents away”, he looks at Svetlana, “Yevgeny loves his mom and his dad, and Ian. And he has a good life with us there is no reason to forbid him to see us, except selfishness. Yevgeny would not benefit from not staying with us in any way. Svetlana already cut our visiting days to a minimum. But we are just as able to take care of our child as she is, and because of that we want joint physical care. We live only two streets apart, Yevgeny could live one week with us and the next week with my ex-wife. We would both have the same responsibility and time with him and that’s the only fair solution and I think, it’s what is in Yevgeny’s interest as well.”

Ian puts his hand on Mickey’s and smiles proudly. 

The judge nods.  
“Okay. Mr Milkovich, your ex-wife makes some serious allegations. Did Yevgeny ever come in contact with drugs?”  
“No, of course not. I don’t even have contact with the majority of my family and if some of them are dealing, they’re not doing it from my home. They don’t live with us. I don’t think Yevgeny ever met one of my brothers since he was a year old.”  
“According to your criminal record, you had to do with drugs in your teenage years.”  
“Yeah, because it does run in the family. But I was a teenager. Since then I cleaned up my act. I never took the drugs myself either. Now, I have a stable job… I even pay taxes. We don’t even drink more than one beer with Yevgeny around.”

“What about your cousin, Sandra?”  
“Yevgeny adores Sandy and the other way around. She’s like aunt and big sister in one for him.”  
“She shows him how to steal and do scam with cards”, Svetlana interrupts.  
Mickey sighs, “Yeah, okay, she does that. But we tell her to stop when we see it. But Sandy also teaches him magic tricks and he has a lot of fun with her. We don’t endanger Yevgeny, we don’t expose him to drugs or violence, we teach him that it’s wrong to steal! Svetlana has no right to take him away from us.”

“I do have right! You didn’t want him in the first place! Don’t act like you care, you hate him! You never play with him or take care of him, never show him any kind of love!”  
“That’s not true!”  
“It is true! When I brought over Yevgeny and carrot boy was not home yet, you asked me to bring him later because you don’t want to be alone with him!”  
Mickey shakes his head, “That was once, he was two years old!”

She scoffs and says something to her lawyer.  
“Your honour, according to Yevgeny himself Mr Milkovich never showed particular interest in him. He never hugged or played with him for the majority of his short life. It is true that his boyfriend, Mr Gallagher takes care of him, but he is unstable. His mental illness is a threat to Yevgeny’s safety.”

“It’s not!”, Mickey exclaims, Ian puts a hand on his shoulder.  
“Mick calm down. It’s okay.”  
“Mr Milkovich, you are very vocal about your boyfriend’s mental health not affecting Yevgeny, but what about you. Is it true that you didn’t show interest in Yevgeny’s life until now?”

Mickey licked his lips, “I admit that I had problems with being a father at first”, he says, he and Ian had practiced explaining those things earlier, “But that’s over now. I overcame my issues and I give my best to be a good dad for him. I can’t make up for the first six or seven years I wasn’t always there for him, but that’s no reason to prevent me from making it better now. And it’s not like he was lonely and unhappy whenever he was at our place. Ian took care of him and played with him and Yevgeny is always happy at our house.”

“We will ask Yevgeny about this in a few minutes”, the judge says, “Mrs Milkovich, please describe your living situation with Yevgeny for me.”  
“I live in apartment with three other women. Everything is clean and nice, and it is close to school.”  
“Does Yevgeny have his own room?”  
“No, he shares room with kids from other women. But that is no problem, Yevgeny likes sharing. And at least he is with other children.”  
“He has contact to other children with us as well, Ian’s niece Franny is one of Yevgeny’s best friends.”, Mickey says, “And your apartment is tiny and way too crowded. Yevgeny’s getting older, is he supposed to share a room with two random kids until he is 18?”

“I could get own apartment if you would pay child support.”  
“I am paying child support.”  
“But not enough. Not as much as if you would have to.”  
Mickey shakes his head, “I already paid enough”, he mumbles, and Ian knows he doesn’t talk about money.

Mickey looks at Svetlana, “Why are you doing this? Yevgeny has it good at our place, we just accepted it when you cut our visiting days. We both know that Yevgeny is not in danger with us. This just you being selfish and hateful towards us. Why? We never did anything to you, you have no reason to hate us like this.”, he shakes his head and looks at the judge, “One day Yevgeny was at our place, he was… six, I think. He called us faggots. He didn’t know what the word meant, he didn’t mean to insult us – it was simply what his mother called us all the time. Once he asked me if I really kill little puppies for fun, because that’s what his mom told him about me – which is not true, by the way. She badmouths us in front of Yevgeny all the time. We never do that, we always make sure Yevgeny is out of the room before we’re talking about what a goddamn, hateful fucking bitch his mother is.”, he looks at Svetlana again.

Ian shakes his head, he had asked him not to call Svetlana this.

“You threw me out of the house with child, how about that?”  
“I didn’t. You left. I never wanted you or a baby in the first place, but I let you stay at my house, you wanted to throw Ian out and I didn’t let you, so you left! If you want to go crying to someone about it, go to my dad.”  
“He is dead.”  
“Yeah, bet neither of you calculated that in your fucking little blackmail plan.”

“Mr Milkovich, what do you mean, when you say, ‘blackmail plan’?”, the judge asks.  
Mickey bites his bottom lip, “Nothing”, he says quickly.

“Okay… if the two of you could calm down then, I want to hear Yevgeny now.”

Yevgeny sits outside with Sandy, “Mommy says, Ian and dad are bad people and I will never see them again after today”, he says to her.  
“Bullshit”, Sandy scoffs, “You know that they aren’t bad people, right?”  
Yevgeny nods, “I don’t want to never see them again.”, he says sadly, “I want to stay at dad’s house more often again.”

Sandy ruffled his hair, “Then you have to tell the judge exactly that, okay? He’s gonna ask you a bunch of questions and you just have to be honest about them. And if you say that you want to keep seeing your dad and Ian, then the judge will let you keep seeing them.”

The judge called Yevgeny in and Sandy hugs him before he goes into the big room. His dad and Ian sit on one table and his mom and a stranger on the other table. Yevgeny had to sit at a table in the middle of the room, in front of the judge.

“Hello Yevgeny.”, the judge says.  
“Hello Mr judge.”  
The judge smiles at him, “Okay, Yevgeny you are at court now, that means you have to always say the truth, okay? I will ask you question and you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to, but if you say something, you have to be honest, understood?”  
Yevgeny nods.

“Okay, do you know why we are here today?”  
“Because mommy wants me to not see dad and Ian anymore.”  
“Right. Do you like living with your mom? Is she a good mom?”

Yevgeny nods, “She is the best mom.”  
“And on how many days a week at you at her place?”  
“I’m there all the time. Every second week end I am at my dad’s house. Except the last week, Mommy said I can’t go.”  
“Do you like your mom’s place.”  
“Yeah, my friends live there too and that’s fun. But sometimes there are too many people there, it’s really small.”

“And what about your dad? Is he a good dad? Does he take good care of you?”  
Yevgeny shrugs, “When I was younger, he never really played with me and Ian and that made me sad.”, he says, “But now it’s so much better. We always make dinner together and I can help him cook and he is proud of me when I do it right. But when I don’t do it right, he is not angry and he doesn’t scream, he just says I have to get out of the way until he fixed it and then I can help again.”  
“And now he plays games with you too?”  
“Yes, and he is a bad loser”, Yevgeny laughs, “And sometimes he tucks me in and reads me a bedtime story before only Ian did that. But dad makes the voices better when he reads. And when I have homework, he helps me with maths. I like it when dad and Ian help me with my homework because they have more patience than mommy.”

The judge nods.  
“You mention Ian a lot, what relationship do you have with him?”  
“He is my dad’s boyfriend. And they’re getting married soon and Ian said I get a cool suit, so I look good at the wedding.”

“And he takes care of you too, right?”  
“Yes, he always reads stories with me and plays with me. When I was younger dad never wanted to play with us, but Ian always did. He always helps me when I need him, and he taught me swimming in the pool of Aunt Debbie’s house. And when I have a nightmare I can always come to Ian and dad’s bed and he protects me from the nightmares… actually Ian is my dad, too, you know? He is like a dad and when they get married, he is my stepdad.”

Ian presses his lips together and tries not to start crying, Mickey takes his hand.

“Okay, I have another question about Ian, do your dad and or he sometimes talk about that Ian is sick?”  
Yevgeny nods slightly, “Sometimes, Ian is so sick that he can’t come out of his bedroom and I can’t see him on the weekend. But that almost never happens. When I come over, he is fine and if he is not then he will be by the time I come back.”  
“Did you ever see Ian when he was sick?”  
Yevgeny shrugs, “Once”, he admits, “Ian wouldn’t come out of his bed and I could see through the crack of the door that dad was feeding Ian.”  
“Feeding him?”  
Yevgeny nods, “And the few times Ian was sick when I was over, dad always took care of him. Brought him medicine and food, but he said, Ian doesn’t want me to see him like that. But I don’t think that’s so bad. Everyone is sick sometimes and dad takes care of Ian when he’s sick like Ian once took care of me when I was sick.”

“Okay, Yevgeny, you’re doing a great job, just a few last questions, okay?”  
Yevgeny nods.  
“Do you sometimes visit Ian’s family?”  
“Yes, they have a pool in summer and me and Franny are always playing pirates. And sometimes we go there for dinner with Ian’s family, he has a lot of siblings. And I get to play with Franny and Freddie.”

“And can you tell me who Franny and Freddie are?”  
“Franny is Aunt Debbie’s child, Aunt Debbie is Ian’s sister. And Freddie is uncle Lip’s child, uncle Lip is Ian’s brother. Freddie is only two so he can’t play everything with us, but he’s really funny and cute.”

“Good. Were you alone outside?”  
“No, Sandy is with me.”  
“That’s your dad’s cousin, right?”  
Yevgeny nods.  
“Do you like her?”  
“Yes, she is super nice and funny. She teaches me cool magic and card tricks when she visits us. And when we play hide and seek with Ian or Franny, she knows the best hiding spots.”  
“And does she teach you how to steal, too?”  
Yevgeny bites his lip and wiggles in his seat, “She tried but Ian said she isn’t allowed to, because stealing is bad. But it’s okay, Sandy’s other magic tricks are not about stealing.”

“Very good, just one last question: Is there any wish you have regarding where you live for how long? I’m sure you love both of your parents and you are not supposed to choose between them, I just want to hear what your ideal outcome of this would be.”

Yevgeny takes a minute to think.  
“I want to have more time with dad and Ian”, he says finally, “But I don’t want to not see my mom either. I just want to keep seeing all three of them and I don’t want my mom to say that I can’t see dad anymore. She says a lot of bad things about dad and Ian and they are not true.”

“Uh-hu and what does she say?”  
“Well, she calls them bad words like the f-word. I would say it now, but Sandy said I should not curse in court. And she says they’re dirty, but dad’s house is cleaner than mom’s apartment. And she says Ian is crazy, but he is not, he is very kind. And she says dad is a bad person, but he is not.”

“Okay, thank you Yevgeny, please wait outside with Sandy again, okay?”  
Yevgeny nods and leaves the court room quickly.

Mickey looks at Svetlana, “You really work that hard to make him hate us, huh? I’m not even surprised, you selfish piece of-“  
“Mick”, Ian says and puts a hand on his shoulder, “Calm down.”  
Mickey shakes his head, “You’re a bad person.”, he says sincerely to his ex-wife and turns away from her.

“Mr Gallagher”, the judge says, ignoring Mickey, “I want to hear you now, at the end. I heard Mrs Milkovich’s concerns about your mental health and Yevgeny praising you. I understand that you have a mental illness?”  
“Yes”, Ian shifts in his seat, “I have bipolar disorder. But I am medicated for years already, I go to a therapist for an evaluation every three months and Mickey and I became very good at seeing the symptoms of mania and depression pretty quickly and I often get my meds adjusted in time. I would never put Yevgeny in danger, and we give our best to not expose Yevgeny to me having an depressed or manic episode… obviously not flawlessly, but there also plays the curiosity of a child a factor.”

The judge nods, he is surprised that from the three people in front of him Ian is supposed to be the “crazy” one, he appears more the calm one who keeps Mr Milkovich grounded and stops him from overreacting.

“I do have a file here in front of me, provided by Mrs Milkovich’s lawyer about a police report. You left Yevgeny in a hot car when he was a baby.”  
“He could have died!”, Svetlana exclaims, “See what danger he is to Yevgeny.”

“I wasn’t medicated at that point”, Ian defends himself, “It’s true, I had a breakdown. It was a difficult time, I was manic, and I didn’t want to accept that I have bipolar like my mom. Mickey wanted to take me to a hospital, and I freaked out, took Yevgeny and took him on a road trip. I know it was risky, irresponsible, stupid and dangerous. But even manic and unmedicated I took care of him. I fed him, I sang to him – I left him in the car to get money to buy him shoes. I know really bad things could have happened. And I will never forgive myself for that. But it’s also the reason I’m so determined in taking my medication now. I don’t want to chance putting Yevgeny in danger ever again. And I am not a danger to him. I love that child, I took care of him since he was a little baby. And now Mickey finally fought off his insecurities and we can finally be a real family. So, please, don’t take this away from us.”

“This is bullshit!”, Svetlana exclaims, “You don’t get to play family with my son suddenly! Mickey didn’t care about Yevgeny for years, he hated him! And now he magically changes mind? No! What if they get custody and he loses interest again? Push Yevgeny away again?”

“I won’t”, Mickey says, “I couldn’t fucking look at him for years because of you, you bitch! I finally can be a dad to him now and you won’t stop me from that!”  
“You did not even pay child support like you should have! You said you don’t give fuck about baby or me!”  
“I shouldn’t have to pay, and I shouldn’t have to care about him! But I did pay child support and I do care about him so shut your fucking mouth for once in your life!”

The two are shouting at each other, while Ian just sits in his seat, biting his lip. The judge finally orders silence in the room.

“Mr Milkovich, why do you think you should not have to care about your own son? That is a profoundly serious thing to say and it is not working in your favour. You do not get to be father when your mood is right for it.”

This is too much for Mickey, Ian knows it. The Milkovich rubs his palms over his face and runs his hands through his hair. Svetlana looks at him with a smug grin on her face.

“Wipe that fucking smug grin off your face”, Ian says and shakes his head, “You’re a cruel woman.”, he looks at Mickey, “Fuck it.”, he looks at the judge, “You want you know why Mickey was not able to take care of Yevgeny the first seven years of his life?”

“Ian- “, Mickey says.  
“No, I’m gonna say it. It’s because Svetlana raped Mickey.”, he says to the judge, “His father made her rape him and when she was knocked up, he forced him to marry her. As long as Terry was alive the only thing Svetlana did with Yevgeny, was using him to blackmail Mickey. ‘What will your father say when I tell him you and orange boy are rubbing your dicks together’ ‘500 dollars or I call him’ ‘maybe he should know he didn’t beat all the queer out of you he’s really gonna kill you this time’ – and that’s just the few things I heard. Svetlana left when I got sick and I begged Mickey to ask her for custody for Yevgeny because I loved that little baby – but Mickey couldn’t even look at him. Every time he looked at him, he relived that day Svetlana did this to him, when he touched Yevgeny it was like he got burned. He couldn’t bring himself to hug him until Yevgeny was seven years old. He worked really hard on getting over this for me, for Yevgeny, he wants to be a good father and for the first time in years he’s able to be a good father and Yevgeny loves finally having a real relationship with him. All these years Svetlana just continued to be awful towards Mickey and badmouthed him behind our backs.”, he puts his hand on Mickey’s shoulder, “Imagine if this would have happened to a girl. If a girl would have been raped, was forced to have a child against her will and marry her rapist – would you make her pay child support? Would you judge her for not knowing how to deal with this child? Because if not then you shouldn’t do the same with Mickey. Everybody should appreciate his progress and not punish him for it by taking Yevgeny away from him now.”, he exhales deeply, “That’s all I have to say.”


	6. Epiloug

A few weeks later

“I don’t care what you say Ian, I want the damn gold chairs”, Mickey says and holds the picture he had glued into his notebook closer to Ian’s face.  
“Yeah, I can see them, I’m not vision impaired, I just don’t know why they have to be golden.”  
“So, you are vision impaired.”, Mickey concludes, “I explained It already, look at the gold chairs and the stargazer lilies together! Fucking hell, it’s not that hard.”  
“Okay, good, calm down. We get the damn gold-white chairs.”  
“See, was that so fucking hard?”  
“No, but I had never thought that out of the two of us you’d get this worked up about wedding details.”, Ian grins at him and kisses his forehead.

“Yeah”, he sighs, “I just wish Dad would still be alive so I could tape him to a chair and make him watch this rainbow parade over and over again”, he grins maliciously.  
Ian chuckles, “You really are the perfect man for me, you know that?”

Someone knocks on the door and both men hurry up and go to the front door where Svetlana and Yevgeny wait for them.

Yevgeny hugs Ian immediately.  
“Hey Yevy”, he grins widely and hugs him back, Yevgeny hugs his dad as well, says good-bye to his mom and then disappears in the living room with Ian.

Svetlana looks after them angrily, then at Mickey, she shoves a backpack with things into his arms.  
“All his school stuff. He has to be at the school at 7.50 latest.”  
“I know.”  
“And he has to be picked up at two.”  
“I know”  
“I hate you”

Mickey shrugs, “You were the one who brought this to court, Svetlana. You can be glad that we got joint physical care. He’s gonna stay two weeks with us then two weeks with you again.”  
“Your little assfucker has to bring up stupid, ancient sob story.”, she spits.  
Mickey nods, “Yeah, and listen, if you keep badmouthing us or try to pull something like this again, I will tell the judge about your illegal prostitution and your questionable status in this country and ask for sole custody. And I would get it. So be glad we have a fair split of time with Yevgeny now and keep your opinions to yourself. He already calls Ian dad, too. If you don’t stop bringing him up against us, he’s gonna forget he has a mommy real soon. Bye”, he says and closes the door.

Yevgeny sits at the kitchen table with Ian and looks through Mickey’s notes for the wedding.  
“What do you think about the chairs, Yevy?”, Mickey asks.  
“They’re pretty, I like the gold”  
“See”, Mickey grins at Ian and kisses his forehead.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The end  
> Thanks for reading


End file.
